You Were Never the Problem: A Reminder of Your Worth in a World That Profits From Self-Doubt

Have you been getting a lot of ads about how we should find wrinkles frustrating, aging is detrimental, and any extra weight or skin is unsightly? I've been bombarded with these for months. It definitely hasn't been damaging to my postpartum self-esteem . . . can you feel my sarcasm?

It's brought me to a very clear revelation: I am never going to be good enough. Let me be more specific: the world will never let me, or you, be good enough. It will always find something wrong with us, with our beliefs, our bodies, our minds, the way we talk to people- everything.

You and I will always be found wanting because the world can never be satisfied. Between the court of public opinion and pharmaceutical and entertainment leviathans real women living real lives must never be allowed to see themselves as they really are.

Can't have women out here loving how they look as they age and passing that wisdom down to the younger generations. Mustn't have happy, healthy mothers that see the beauty in stretch marks. Or generous grandmothers who love their laugh lines and grey hair.

Want to know why?

They lose their power.

They lose their money.

They lose their influence.

So maybe we stop caring.

Maybe, when the ad pops up, we just see it for what it is: a shameful money grab that's feeding off the very insecurities these industries nurtured since the youth of our grandmothers.

I'm not saying we shouldn't take care of ourselves or that dyeing one's hair is bad or that in order to love yourself you shouldn't get cosmetic surgery.

I just mean that real beauty can't be built on self-hate and fear of the natural progression of life.

Insulting ourselves into looking better isn't going to work.

It's time we realize our truest beauty doesn’t exist in what we lack- perfect weight, smaller jeans, fewer wrinkles, bigger cup size, etc- but instead exists in what is already here. 

We are divine creatures. Our bodies have the DNA of galaxies woven between our cells. We have rare elements of limitless value coursing through our veins.

No soul is exactly alike. Your impressive mind, your interests, and abilities . . . your kindness and generous spirit.

You were uniquely created with an individual worth that goes beyond what any marketing agency could sell.

We are literally priceless.

Even still, the ads won't stop.

And neither will life's toll on our physical bodies.

But we can stop listening. We can stop being motivated by fear, self-loathing, and comparison.

We are the most complex and most beautiful work in all of creation.

Maybe we can take a note from these remarkable women in these images, and we can start appreciating ourselves for what we really are and leave the rest.

Love, Melinda

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